Every day we have something to be thankful for. Today I am thankful for switches, buttons and levers.
The mind of a child functions in a more simplistic fashion. A naive and innocent system that lies helpless at the alluring beckon of temptation and pines for instant gratification. As a child, and also at times as an adult, there is nothing quite like the temptation of a big fat button. Just peaking into a cockpit has the same effect on ones brain as a top shelf stripper has on a 14 year olds penis. Instant mental erection.
Words such as Execute, Initiate, Start, Stop, Launch, Self Destruct, Blast Off, Begin Sequence, and the ever famous DO NOT PUSH are all words associated with the power of a switch, button or lever and for whatever reason we have an impending impulse to want to feel this power in our finger tips by flicking, pressing and cranking these captivating controls of commencement. Therefore, I shall bow my brow and say "thanks, merci and gracias" for giving us the opportunity to feel this desire.
Some situations that may lead you to having your way with a switch, button or lever include: opening a garage door, being an executioner, detonating a bomb, being a character on Loony Toons, working as a roller-coaster operator, driving a really nice Lexus, being a 00 Agent, attending Space Camp, being an impulsive and undisciplined child, seeing a "Big Red Button" of which has undisclosed purpose, etc.
KISS is an acronym that is taught in the fields of art/design/photography/ advertisement/etc. which stands for "Keep It Simple, Stupid." It is supposed to encourage people to keep things simplistic in the light of "less is more". This can certainly be true, but sometimes I wish that some things were WAY more complicated. There is just no luster in turning a key to start my car anymore. Sometimes I wish that it was a whole process involving metal toggles above my head, switches by me knees and buttons galore. I think that one of the most satisfying spectacles to witness is someone flicking multiple identical switches in a row with each flick illuminating a corresponding light. I want that in my life! Maybe one day my dream will come to fruition, but for now it still brings much joy just to know that these things are out there.
So let's all take a moment and say "Today I am thankful for switches, buttons, and levers." Unless you find this entire topic to be a mundane, incomprehensible and completely ridiculous form of immature self gratification in which case you must say "Do your parents sometimes wish that they would have just adopted?"
Thanks for listening. Check back for more things to be thankful for in days to come.
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