Thursday, November 5, 2009

Daily Thanks - Day 12 - Lost in Woods

Every day we have something to be thankful for. Today I am thankful that I am not lost in the woods.

Some may think that getting lost in the woods is somewhat of a double edged sword. Sure you may run the risk of being "Blair Witched", but at the same time you will finally get to put those "Survivorman" skills to the test! After all, you did watch the marathon on The Discovery Channel.

But I assure you that you are no Les Stroud. You are no Bear Grylls. In fact, you probably know less about surviving in the wild than Carrie Bradshaw. It would not be a super groovy time and if you managed to survive you would probably come out looking like an anorexic jaundice patient.

Some situations that may cause you to become lost in the woods include: hiking, making a documentary, hunting squirrels, disposing a body, looking for someone who is lost in the woods, plane crash, parachuting mishap, canoeing with Jon Voight, taking psychotropic drugs, etc.

I love the city. I've always lived in the city and as nice as it is to go out to a lake or a mountain house every once in a while it's only a matter of time before the beckoning serenade of the city draws me in like a leggy seductress on the prowl for a cute white boy.

So let's all take a moment and say "Today I am thankful that I am not lost in the woods." Unless at the moment you ARE lost in the woods in which case you must say "Don't eat the mushrooms. Don't eat the mushrooms. Don't eat the mushrooms. Don't eat the.... Eat only one mushroom. Eat only one mushroom."

Thanks for listening. Check back for more things to be thankful for in days to come.

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