Every day we have something to be thankful for. Today I am thankful for thumbs.
The thumb. Something that is shared not only in a very small number of animals but only specifically in those most fortunate of primates. It is something that we all take for granted and unless your hands resemble that of Dennis Hopper in "Speed" then I'd say we have a much worthy candidate for some thanks with a side of french fried potatoes. In fact, you could say that I would like to give my thumbs a good ol' fashioned "thumbs up."
Some situations that require the use of thumbs include: hunting, gathering, throwing a frisbee, cupping a breast, rowing a kayak, stealing a road sign, giving a thumbs up, giving a thumbs down, hanging out with Jack Kerouak, eating a sandwich, drawing a tiger, erasing a tiger, texting, playing gameboy, unhooking a bra, giving a massage, opening a condom wrapper, gauging someone's eyes out, picking up a puppy, writing a ransom note, giving the "ok" sign, sticking a finger through your ok sign to suggest sexual activity etc. All of this could be yours for one small payment of $19.99.
I think our lives would be much different without this hero of all phalanges. Whether you want to pursue a career in water polo or snap your fingers with a barbershop quartet, you will need those opposable beauties.
Take this as my psalm to this friend of the palm. a dedication to the betta metacarpal. The most legit digit. So, of course, let's all take a moment and say "Today I am thankful for thumbs." Unless you do not have any thumbs in which case you must say "You people with thumbs think you're so great. Let's see you get out of a pair of handcuffs as fast as me!"
Thanks for listening. Check back for more things to be thankful for in days to come.
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